Slainte [minutelovestory #66]

Posted by on Apr 19, 2013 in minutelovestories | No Comments

Gathered around the table, its two wide leaves included, producing an expansive dining arrangement, ten high-backed chairs are drawn up and the linen tablecloth once belonging to my grandmother, patterned with grapes and pineapples, drapes onto the laps of my dinner guests. Counterclockwise, we have Denny, an overweight reformed cocaine and sex addict whose wife, Tanya, 18 years his junior, only allows him to have sex with her three times a month. To endure these episodes, Tanya gets drunk on vodka tonics with lime. Next to Tanya is dark-haired Gretchen, who’s been smacked twice with the open fist of her husband William, seated adjacently. Gretchen’s told me several times she’s convinced William has sex with men. William cheats at golf and once killed a kitten with a tennis racket. To his left is Beatrice. She wears her hair in a bob and masturbates to Stravinsky and her girlfriend, Laurel, steals yogurts from the office refrigerator. Across from Laurel, Donna and Michael laugh at William’s joke about Gretchen’s most recent fender bender. To my right is Jonathan. He is extremely affable, has left me twice and embezzled money from my sister four years ago. To your health, flock of liars. Murder of fibbers. School of deceivers. Salud.